Hold Me Down (The Deacons of Bourbon Street #3) Read online

  He went out the door, pulling it shut after him, then going to stand on the pier, like he had done for years. Watching as nature recovered itself after the devastation of the hurricane had torn it to shreds.

  Funny. There hadn’t been another hurricane, but he felt like he’d been hit by one. As if his insides had been picked up by a massive storm and ripped apart, the pieces flying everywhere, never to be put back together.

  Like the Deacons. Except the Deacons had rebuilt themselves, slowly but surely. Maybe one day he’d be able to do the same.

  He was still standing there, staring out across the bay, when Cash finally pulled up, grumbling about having to rescue him and giving him hell about having his bike stolen by his woman.

  Blue ignored him and pretty soon, catching his mood, Cash shut the fuck up.

  They made good time back to the city, burning rubber all the way down the highway, heading straight for the Ministry clubhouse.

  The streets around the big warehouse building seemed unusually quiet as Blue and Cash finally rolled to a stop in one of the small alleys nearby.

  There were already a few tall figures waiting there, Ajax and one of the brand-new prospects, plus a couple of other guys that Blue didn’t recognize. They weren’t brothers, but by the tats and the hard expressions on their faces, they were probably Ajax’s mercenary buddies.

  “About fucking time,” Ajax said as Blue got off Cash’s bike. “Your property’s been causing us a massive fucking headache.”

  Blue thrust his hands in the pockets of his jeans mainly to keep from punching his president in the face. “I told you she would have warned Blade.”

  “Yeah, well, luckily we’ve managed to seal off the streets around the clubhouse. Reinforcements aren’t getting in anytime soon.” In the dim light coming from the streetlights, Ajax’s expression was hard, but his eyes burned. Clearly he’d been waiting for this moment. “Half of Blade’s officers rolled out of here a couple of hours ago, which means he’s in there pretty much half a club down.” Ajax gave a feral grin. “Which is perfect fucking timing for us.”

  Something twisted inside Blue, tight and painful. This whole situation felt wrong. As if going through with this revenge raid with Ajax wasn’t what he should be doing. Christ, how was it going to affect Alice? Ajax seemed pretty confident he could take Blade down, and what if he did? Alice would lose yet another home.

  You promised you wouldn’t hurt her again.

  His fingers curled into fists in the pockets of his jeans. “I got a bad feeling about this, Ajax,” he said slowly, feeling the twist and pull of his loyalties even as he did so. “Red said Blade was innocent.”

  “Red. Who changed teams. Who’s been fucking around getting this so-called proof for us.” He reached around to the small of his back and pulled out a handgun. “Whose fucking pussy appears to be made of gold from the way you keep panting after her.”

  A flare of pure rage licked up inside Blue, and it was only sheer force of will that kept his fist in his pocket and not buried in the other man’s face. He gritted his teeth. “Yeah, I know your feelings on the subject. But shit, what have we got to lose by talking first? Just check out if it’s true or not.”

  Ajax stared at him. “Are you fucking kidding me? You think we should just waltz up there and say, ‘Hi, Blade. By the way, did you kill Priest?’ ”

  Blue scowled, knowing it sounded ridiculous. Shit, what was wrong with him? “Okay, I know it sounds dumb. But what’s the point of getting into a war with someone who may not have killed Priest in the first place? I mean, what if he didn’t? What if we kill Blade and the fucker who actually did it gets off scot free?”

  There was a silence in the alley.

  The guys standing behind Ajax muttered something, but Ajax suddenly held up his gun in a silencing gesture. He fixed Blue with his hard-out stare. “And Blade’s just going to tell us. And we’re going to believe him because we’re good motherfuckers like that.” The scorn virtually dripped off his words.

  But the unease about this whole situation was a hard knot inside Blue’s gut and he knew he couldn’t let it go. He was the only one who could stop Ajax, and if he didn’t at least try and it ended up going badly for Alice, he’d never forgive himself.

  He didn’t trust Blade as far as he could throw him. But Alice did. And Blue trusted Alice. If she said Blade was innocent, then maybe it was time to believe her.

  “Ten minutes, Ajax,” Blue said. “I don’t think we can risk doing this and getting it wrong.”

  Ajax’s eyes narrowed. “You’re letting your dick do your thinking for you, brother.”

  “She’s my old lady. I trust her.”

  “Yeah, well I fucking don’t.”

  “I’m not asking you to.” Blue held the other man’s gaze. “I’m asking you to trust me.”

  Another silence fell.

  “He’s not wrong, Ajax,” Cash murmured from behind Blue. “We’re not going to lose anything if we check this out.”

  “Only our element of goddamn surprise.” Ajax was now looking extremely pissed.

  But that was only because the guy knew Blue was right. They couldn’t risk being wrong, not about this. Not about Priest’s murder.

  “We lost that when Red escaped,” Blue said.

  “And if he’s guilty?” Ajax folded his arms, his handgun gleaming in the light. “We won’t have a chance like this again, Blue. You know that.”

  “Yeah, I know that.” He stared back at his president, ignoring the doubt that sat inside him, the little voice going what if you’re wrong? He wasn’t wrong. Alice was certain and he had to go with that. “You can take it out on me if I fuck up, okay?”

  “Oh believe me, I will.” Ajax’s mouth twisted in another feral smile. “In fact, if you want the meeting? You go set it up.”

  Well, he couldn’t say he didn’t have that coming.

  Blue lifted a shoulder and without a word, he walked straight out of the alley, heading for the Ministry clubhouse. As he got closer he raised his hands in a gesture of surrender, while at the same time bracing himself for a bullet. He had no idea whether this was going to work or not, but he had to try. For Alice’s sake.

  As he approached the front of the clubhouse, someone shouted, “One more step and you’re dead, motherfucker!”

  Blue stopped. A couple of Ministry dickheads were guarding the door, weapons drawn. He kept his hands where they were. “Get Blade,” he said, putting as much authority as he could into his voice. “Ajax wants to talk.”

  One of the guards laughed. “Talk? Are you fucking mad? Why the hell would we want to talk to a bunch of pussies like you?”

  Blue bared his teeth. “I dunno. Because we have this fucking warehouse surrounded by mercenaries?” Goddamn. Ajax had better have this warehouse surrounded by mercenaries because if the guards didn’t believe him, he was royally fucked.

  “Bullshit,” said the other guard.

  “Then why haven’t you had reinforcements yet?” Blue pointed out.

  The guards muttered something he couldn’t hear.

  “Like I said, get Blade,” he repeated. “And maybe we’ll let you live.”

  Nothing happened at first and he wondered if maybe this was all going to turn to shit. That he’d done sweet fuck-all to help Alice and he wasn’t sure how he was going to stand it if he failed.

  Then one of the guards abruptly turned and disappeared inside. A couple of minutes passed before he came back out, his expression grim. “Blade’ll see you and Ajax. No one else.”

  A certain amount of relief filled Blue but he fought it down, not wanting to show any weakness.

  Ten minutes later he and Ajax were escorted through the Ministry doors, down a short corridor and through a doorway at the end. The room they stepped into was massive, strewn with couches and tables and other bits and pieces of furniture. Standard biker clubhouse decor.

  Blade stood in the center, with only a couple of his men on either side of him. So, an int
imate little discussion was clearly in the cards.

  And then he saw who was sitting on one of the couches.

  Alice. Her face was pale, her blue eyes burning with an expression he was infinitely familiar with. Determination.

  Pain settled in his gut. Fuck, she was beautiful. How had he ever let her go?

  Her gaze came to his for a moment, a fleeting glance, complicated. Full of things he didn’t really understand. But he thought he caught gratitude in it before she looked away. As if she’d known that he was the reason Ajax was here instead of setting fire to the whole place.

  Realization shot through him then. There was only one reason Blade had agreed to talk. And that was because she’d convinced him to.

  Sure enough, hard on the heels of that knowledge, Blade said, “The Ministry’s got nothing to prove to you cocksuckers, so I’m gonna keep this short and sweet.”

  “Good plan,” Ajax replied. “I don’t like fucking around when I’ve got killing to do.”

  Blade snorted. “Go get the prisoner, Snake.”

  The man next to Blade moved, vanishing through a door, while Blade and Ajax eyed each other.

  “Gotta hand it to you, Ajax,” Blade said into the tense silence. “You got a lot of balls coming in here with not even half a club. Who’ve you got protecting your territory?”

  “My old lady.”

  Blade gave another snort. “That all?”

  Ajax smiled one of his feral smiles. “She knows how to use a gun and she’s stronger than you assholes.”

  With effort, Blue kept his attention on Blade, not wanting to give anything away by looking at Alice. But it was hard. Fucking hell, why had she come back here? And why hadn’t Blade sent her away with the other women?

  “You’d better hope so. Because I’m a bit fucking pissed you think you can come into Ministry territory and take us out.” Blade’s dark eyes glittered with menace. “In fact, I would have taken you and your pathetic mercenary crew out already if Red here hadn’t basically begged me to talk.”

  Ajax’s gaze flicked to the woman sitting on the couch. “What the fuck are you talking about? You let some bitch dictate to you?”

  “No.” The menace had sharpened in Blade’s tone and Blue found himself tensing. “But the only reason you’re still standing is this ‘bitch’ here and the debt I owe her father. You might want to speak about her with a bit more fucking respect.”

  Ajax bristled, and Blue knew things were probably going to go bad if he didn’t do something. “Take it easy, Prez,” he muttered. “I know he’s being a prick, but let’s hear him out.”

  At that point the door Snake had disappeared through banged open again and he was back, dragging some guy after him by the collar. He hauled the man into the center of the room, then gave him a kick, dropping him to his knees.

  The man groaned. His face was a fucking mess, his nose broken, his mouth bloody, one of his eyes swollen shut. He looked like someone had used him for a punching bag. Even so, Blue recognized him.

  Gator. The one who’d attacked Alice out in the street. The guy who Alice had said killed Priest.

  Blue found himself snarling, his hands already in fists. Christ, wouldn’t he love the chance to get in a kick himself! It was the least anyone who laid violent hands on Alice deserved.

  “Who the fuck is this?” Ajax demanded.

  “Tell them, Gator,” Blade ordered, his voice utterly cold. “Tell them what you told us or I’ll fucking kill you right now.”

  Gator’s breath wheezed in the sudden, tense silence. “You’re gonna fucking kill me anyway.”

  “Yeah, but if you talk I’ll let you keep your dick before I put a bullet in your brain.”

  Gator coughed, then spat on the floor. “Shit. Okay. I ran Priest off the road.” His voice was all mushy and thick. “I was paid to do it and to make it look like the order came from Blade.”

  A savage kind of satisfaction turned over inside of Blue and he couldn’t help but flash a glance at Alice. She wasn’t looking at him, her attention on Gator instead, her expression absolutely unreadable.

  “And you have no idea who paid you?” Ajax demanded.

  Gator shook his head. “No. My contact never told me and I didn’t ask. I just needed the fucking money.”

  “Tell them what you found, Red,” Blade said, ignoring Gator completely.

  Alice slowly got to her feet, her attention on Ajax now. “I found paint flecks in scratches on Gator’s bike. It was specialized paint used for high-spec custom paint jobs. Basically it was the same paint that was used on Priest’s Harley.”

  Ajax said nothing for a long moment, and the tension in Blue’s gut continued to sit there. Then he said, “So what you’re saying is that this was a setup?”

  Blade folded his arms. “If I wanted Priest dead, believe me, I wouldn’t fucking hide it.” That was true, if nothing else was. Cash had found the payment for the hit in Blade’s accounts, disguised as “laundry.” Blade continued. “And why the fuck would I pay one of my own men for a hit when they’d do it for me for free if I asked them?”

  Another silence fell, broken only by the sound of Gator’s wheezing moans.

  Disgust flickered across the Ministry president’s face. “Get this piece of shit out of here, Snake,” he ordered. “He’s served his purpose.”

  Ajax was silent again, staring at Blade as Snake dragged the piece of shit formerly known as Gator out the door. “I guess that answers that question then,” he said after a moment.

  “Yeah, it does,” Blade answered. “But it doesn’t answer any of mine.” He paused, and his attention moved to the woman standing next to him. “Does it, Red?”

  Every muscle in Blue’s body tensed.

  But if she heard the danger signals in Blade’s voice, she gave no sign. There was no fear in her face at all, only that steadfast determination he knew so well.

  “All this was started by you, Red,” Blade continued quietly. “Those rumors you were talking about, the ones that had me pegged for Priest’s murder—I want to know where you got them from.”

  Alice lifted her chin and met her president’s gaze. “I told you. I overheard them at The Priory.”

  “Sure you did.” Blade stared at her. “Brothers don’t talk about club business where there might be others listening in. The Deacons may be pricks, but they’re not stupid.”

  Blue found himself ready to go for it, to fight if necessary. If Blade touched her—fuck, if anyone touched her—he’d kill him. He could tell by the way Ajax had also tensed beside him that he was ready to do the same.

  Because if Blade found out that Alice had been getting these “rumors” from Blue, that they’d been seeing each other, the shit would really hit the fan. For both of them.

  This was the flash point. This was where the war could really start.

  “I can’t tell you,” Alice said staunchly into the deafening silence, the look on her face strong and certain. “I won’t tell you.”

  “Red,” Blade said. “I’m giving you an order.”

  Alice looked down at the floor for a moment. Then suddenly she lifted her head. “You’ve looked out for me a long time because of Dad, Blade. And you have to know I appreciate that more than I can say. You gave me a home when I needed it and protection, too. You had my back. But I’m not obeying your order.” She took an audible breath. “I release you from your obligation to Dad, and in return I want you to release me from mine. I want out. I want out of the Ministry.”

  Chapter 12

  The silence was deafening, and Alice could feel the shock reverberating through the room.

  But she wasn’t going to back down or take it back. It was the right decision.

  Because the moment Blue had walked into the clubhouse with Ajax, she’d known he was the one who’d convinced Ajax to talk to Blade, that he hadn’t just blindly followed his president into a war that would only end in needless bloodshed. And she knew, too, what that must have cost him. He’d gone against
his club. For her.

  She’d always known Blade would ask her at some point. Would want to press the issue. And this could have been the moment where she betrayed Blue. Where she told Blade exactly how she’d found out about Priest and those rumors. Obeying her president and being true to her club.

  But she couldn’t do it and she never would.

  She had to protect Blue. Because she loved him. And there was only one way to do that.

  She had to leave the Ministry.

  “What the fuck makes you think you can get out just like that?” Blade demanded, his voice harsh in the echoing silence. “After all these fucking years?”

  She didn’t look at either Ajax or Blue, keeping her gaze on Blade. He was angry, and hell, he had a right to be. But she wasn’t going to back down. “Because you promised my dad you’d do the right thing for me. And this is the right thing.”

  Blade’s eyes glittered. He lifted his hand and ran it through his hair, clearly pissed as all hell. “Fuck, Red. No one walks out on me, on the club. You know that.”

  Her heartbeat was loud in her head and though she didn’t have a cut to throw off and she couldn’t exactly get rid of the tattoo, there was one other way to show him she was serious and call his bluff.

  “Then you’d better stop me, hadn’t you?” she said.

  And without waiting for a response, she turned and began heading toward the exit.

  She passed Blue and Ajax, and although every part of her wanted to look at Blue, she didn’t.

  Every step she took, she kept expecting Blade to stop her. To have a brother grab her arm and keep her from leaving. But no one did. And it wasn’t until she’d gone out the front doors that she realized no one would.

  Her legs shook and her knees were weak, but she kept on walking.

  For the first time in years, she was free. Of everything and everyone. There was no one to protect her now, no one to keep her safe. And it was terrifying.

  No wonder. Keeping yourself safe is all you’ve been doing for years.